Plain and simple: doing it all is a myth.
There is no one on this planet that has the hours in a day to walk their dog, go to the gym, prepare 3 homecooked meals plus snacks, work a full-time job and a side hustle, clean their home, have a social life, and all the other things that we are told we absolutely have to do in order to have a fulfilling life.
It’s just not a thing.
Even if it was, would it really be worth it?
Never having a slow moment, never sipping your coffee as the sun comes up outside your window, never curling up with a new book or the TV remote, never room to breathe. Constantly rushing from thing to thing, never hiring other people for certain tasks or delegating to other people in our household and community. Never having the time to savor moments we love, because we have an endless list of boxes to check.
That doesn’t sound worth it to me.
From the outside, maybe it seems like I do it all, but that is 100% not the case and really only 50% me. None of it would be possible without a roommate who does their share of chores, doctors and friends who help with pain management, a community that supports me and works with me to find time to hang out that works with my crazy schedule, and a whole lot of helpful routines learned through trial and error. Oh, and getting rid of half my crap because I just couldn’t take it anymore.
I don’t do it all. I just prioritize.
I know that, if I’m on my phone (or really screens in general) right after waking up, my attention span will be garbage. YouTube isn’t much help either. So, I stay of screens for the first 2 hours of my day, and focus on all the things I need to get done that don’t revolve around screens. I walk my dog, do my physical therapy exercises, make breakfast and coffee, work on any household things that need to be done, meditate, and read a little bit of whatever book I’m working through at that moment. This sets me up for a day that is productive and focused, instead of flitting from thing to thing every 2 minutes from the moment I wake up, because that is a priority for me.
I know that, as someone living with chronic health conditions, I have to prioritize my health or risk debilitating consequences. That is a high priority for me. I go to my weekly and occasional appointments, I eat my veggies, I block out time for a healthy amount of sleep, and drink lots and lots of water. Because of this, I avoid being out extremely late, set aside time each day and week to prepare healthy food, and am intentional about scheduling and being on-time for appointments. It’s all a give and take.
My priorities guide the way that I block out time and plan my life. I know what my core values are and what needs to take up the bulk of my schedule, and I plan around that. I say no to the load of laundry so I can say yes to a new work project, and no to binge-watching TV so I can say yes to hanging out with a friend.
I’m not the person who does it all. I don’t want to be. Chances are, if you really think about it, you don’t want to be either. Know what is most important for you, and plan the rest of life around that. You won’t do it all, perfectly, all the time, but you’ll do what matters, well, most of the time. That is enough.